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How Do I Stop?!?!?

I started back to work at the beginning of September last year, after 7.5 weeks of maternity leave – waaaaaay to short in the grand scheme of things but especially considering the fact that I had a c-section…..but the bills have to get paid, right?  So at this point…..I’ve been pumping at work (and a little at home) for almost 11 months.

I’m done.

To be honest, I was done 3 months ago when I decided that I officially hated pumping.

See, this is not me……

Never was.  I mean, yeah, at first I kind of welcomed the breaks………but now it’s more like this……

However……..I wanted to at least make sure that Amelia had breastmilk to drink at the daycare until she hit the one year mark….so I kept at it and we started introducing rice milk and coconut milk because I felt they were more acceptable snack-time drinks at this point than plain old whole milk.  And my grand plan was that once Amelia was officially one year old, I would hang up my horns – leave the pump at home and never ever look at it again……until next time.

But…..I don’t know how!

I intended to get up on Wednesday morning after my little vacation and just nurse Amelia and head off to work, kicking my pump bag as I walked past it and start sending my freezer stash with her for as long as that would last…..it wouldn’t be long.……maybe two weeks.

Amelia wasn’t really interested in nursing much Wednesday morning, though.  She’s pretty well reverse cycled so she had nursed a good bit during the night….but not enough……so I picked up my pump bag and walked out the door.  Yesterday morning, she was a little more interested…..but I brought the pump just in case and I didn’t use it.  By the time bed time rolled around, she had managed to nurse a good bit of the over-abundance but I was a little tempted to pump before I went to sleep……again she nursed well during the night, but I felt over-full on one side this morning and she only wanted the other side so I dragged the pump along with me and took a break again………

I just don’t know what to do here.

And honestly, at this point it’s not even a matter of me just not wanting to do it anymore…..my employer only provides for lactating mothers for 12 months after birth.  I’m officially past the 12 month mark.  If I hadn’t changed jobs back in February, I’m sure that I would not be having this dilemma, it would have been a non-issue…..not that they could tell me I can’t pump on my lunch or anything, but I would be doing so either in my car or in some remote public bathroom.  Thankfully, my new boss is much cooler, having breastfed all four of her own children for at least 2 years….two of whom are currently breastfeeding their own children!!  But…..should something unforeseen happen, policy could come and slap me in the face :-\

I only pump once during my 7.5 hour shift and then nurse on demand the other 16.5 hours…..but I have no idea how to cut out that pumping break and A) not be completely miserable and uncomfortable and B) not eff up my “weekend” nursing – lol :^)  I would really love to hear from any other working mama’s that have weaned from pumping but continued to nurse – any and all tips, tricks and whines (and wines!) welcome!!

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Birthday Girl!!!

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Unbelievable as it is, Amelia’s first birthday was Thursday!!  Her FIRST birthday – that means a whole year has gone by since this little beauty made her appearance…..that first year is a funny thing and I remember thinking the same thing around Brittany’s first birthday……..

……it is both the longest and shortest year of my life :^)

And I’ve gone through it twice!!

More than a decade apart – lol!

I wonder if it’s different for people who have multiple children close together…..

In any case, I wanted to have a simpler party for her birthday than we did for her Baptism in May – no renting a room, no days getting food together…..just a nice picnic at the playground with some meats on the grill….is there anything better for a summer birthday?

So we grabbed a kick-bottom cupcake cake from ShopRite and hauled up to our family’s favorite playground in Tullytown, PA with some family and good friends to celebrate my baby girl’s big Numero Uno ;^)

Everyone had a great time, especially Amelia….now that she’s motoring, she made her way around all the tables stopping to visit everyone on the way…..that is, of course, until her Godmother arrived and pretty much handed her the keys to the car – lol :^)

She’s spent more time with this than pretty much any other gift she got…..and she got some pretty cool gifts!!

I’m also ALWAYS looking for new board books for Amelia….I have a ton of Brittany’s still, but there are some that I never had for her that I’m looking for now.   One of my good friends picked up Where’s Spot – only the cutest pop-up book I’ve seen in a long time, even after reading it 7 times in 25 minutes…..and one page an extra 3 times – as well as On The Night You Were Born which is simply beautiful and really just about sums up what I would say happened on the nights BOTH my girls were born ;^)

It was a great afternoon for everyone and I’m so happy that our family and friends could share it with us.

What did you do for your little one’s special day?

Amelia’s 1st Birthday!!

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Hard to believe that a whole year has come and gone since that first night I held that stubborn little girl in my arms!!! Now she’s well on her way to becoming a stubborn toddler – lol 🙂 Happy 1st birthday, Amelia Jane – we love you like crazy!!! 🙂